"Upgrade"

I have a special ability to download games and movies into my mind by just playing it long enough... For a simple games it takes around 48 to 72 hours... For big games it takes weeks... And some movies take single viewing.. Most don't..

Perks of having it.. I can study the work when I'm sleeping...

With my mind at rest... I can still go to work.. In my dreams...

And simulate it wherever and whenever I want..

Sometimes in people's faces...

And with a little eccentric imagination..

I can do whatever I want as well..

Disadvantages happens when you get terribly sick...

When you hallucinate, you're basically stuck playing non-stop and that is tiring...

I once got sick and played Pokemon for hours in my head...

It's repetitive gameplay was like a nightmare...

To have this ability while aspiring to make numerous kinds of artworks games and movies and the like in the future is no coincidence... I'm destined to be what I want to be..

Unluckily, some people don't realise that.. And decides to doom my future instead just because of selfish interests and wrong perception..

Luckily, I've come to realise at an early age that no one is there to save you.. You always have to take up arms on your own..

I've played a lot of games... Watched heck a lot of movies..

It was fun and entertaining... But I was not in it to just for entertainment.. I learn from it and since then learned a lot..

It has been a part of my life..

From pesky alteration of good old "slipper game"

To creating my own board game...

From making 3d animations and photoshop..

And direct, capture, edit, and star in my own film somehow..

Rephrase.. It is my life...

Other than that ability, I have a background in engineering, physics, chemistry, biology, prose, poetry, arts, crafts, pastry, and that list goes on... Most of those stuff help in making almost anything...

Well if you're curious...

If all these I'm writing has a purpose...

It does.. I'm not just bragging whatsoever..

I'm suffering from low-self esteem and low self-appreciation..

I'm writing this to shout out to the world that I'm this...

Like some kid ranting that he can do this that or whatever..

To just help myself declare that I'm not stupid like others think..

That I'm not as useless as others suggest..

That I'm not some trash to be thrown away..

That I'm a person and I have feelings..

And I have something greater to offer..

Not just some poetry,

or an answer to an assignment,

or a research paper..

I'm someone who can create and think outside the box..

Someone who can probably change the world..

But sadly, no one appreciates that..

So here I am ranting about it..

In a long post barely anyone is going to read..

Starting off proud ending up sad..

That's been my formula ever since..

Ever since I've been trying to prove myself to the world...

To my mom, in all those Science Contests and in all those Awarding Ceremonies, some of which she didn't get to attend..

To my dad, in all achievements I've had he's never heard of..

To my siblings, in all efforts to be the best I can be for them..

To my friends, in everything..

Ever since then, it seems that I've always failed..

So it is over, It's not about proving myself to others anymore..

It is time for me to stand up for myself..

It is for my future, my generation, and my life..

I will prove myself worthy of being me..

People will forget me...

This post will be deleted...

The records of me will rot...

That will be my greatest glory..

If I'm not fixing this story..

I have the ability to download..

Like every software, there will be bugs and glitches..

And error and pop-up warnings like this..

But there are always patches and upgrades..

I can always upgrade...

And that means I'm fixing this story...

Today, will end with a quote from somewhere else in the internet...

"One bad chapter doesn't mean your story is over."